Good afternoon, whoever you are...
My topic for right now is Friendship.
I used to think Friendship was an amazing thing. Was something that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. But over the years, I realize who I give my friendship to, found me disposable. Recently, I went through a huge emotional roller coaster, and the people I thought were there for me forever, didn't bother about me. So, the result, I felt like I wasn't worthy of friendship nor did anyone care.
I told someone dear to me about it (my big brother Evan) and last week, amidst a breakdown of feeling like no one gave a damn about me, I did another suicide attempt. I took a bottle of prescription pills and cried all night. My brother freaked out, and my boo Kendrick threatened to call 911, the police, etc.
Unfortunately, at the time, the pills didn't work and I woke up unharmed. I knew this was an attempt that wouldn't go through because overdose never worked for me before. However, I took this as another sign that I'm not supposed to go out like that.
Yeah, those who claimed friendship left me out, tossed me in the gutter, etc., etc. But a wise person once told me, "When one is born to lead, they often feel alone. Those who truly support your leadership will be there for you forever." And I repeat this every time I feel alone. It's not that I don't need friends, nor am I worthy of them; It's just I haven't ran into any true friends. I am a Junior in college, and I'm wondering if that's possible. ......Time will tell....
In the meantime....
"When one is born to lead, they often feel alone. Those who truly support your leadership will be there for you forever."
Your thoughts?
